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Really Bad Things

from The Anarchist's Jokebook by Devo Spice

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about

Poop. It's about poop. This is a parody of “Bad Things” by Machine Gun Kelly featuring Camila Cabello.

lyrics

[chorus 1]
Must be outta my head, must be outta my mind
But I really love that man of mine
so sweet, since we were first dating
The way that he smells is intoxicating
When he’s in the stall, it’s like his secret lair
He does some really really bad things in there
So bad, my eyes are dilated
What can I say? He’s constipated

[verse 1]
(ngh) I just sit here (ngh) and I push and strain
(ngh) And if I push too hard, I might pop my brain
Been a long while, and a mighty bout
And oh my God, smells so bad that I might pass out
Bend over at the waste now, stench dissolving the wall’s grout
Nails dig into my thighs, a marble-size piece falls out
And I’m muffling all my shouts, while my teeth all crack in my mouth
As the pain builds up in my gut, hope my colon doesn’t pop out

[pre-chorus]
And I said it’s quite the endeavor, feels like I’m in here forever
Stars in my vision as I clench my teeth together
I want you forever, we’ll asphyxiate together
Ours is much better than just whips and chains and leather

[chorus 2]
Must be outta my head, must be outta my mind
But I really love that man of mine
He’s so sweet, since we were first dating
The way that he smells is intoxicating
When he’s in the stall, it’s like his secret lair
He does some really really bad things in there
So bad, a task force was created
What can I say? He’s constipated

[verse 2]
(ngh) I just can’t take it (ngh) my face is flush
But at least I beat another level on Candy Crush
It feels like a cannon ball, comes out my ass
And when it passes, it rips me in half
Let me crack a window, try to air out my house
Last time I lit a match, singed off both eyebrows
Sorry that you had to listen, to all the noises that you heard
Like I’m trying to give birth to a twelve pound baby turd

[pre-chorus]
And I said it’s quite the endeavor, feels like I’m in here forever (how long have you been in there?)
Stars in my vision as I clench my teeth together
I want you forever, we’ll asphyxiate together
Ours is much better than just whips and chains and leather

[chorus 3]
Must be outta my head, must be outta my mind
But I really love that man of mine
He’s so sweet, since we were first dating
The way that he smells is intoxicating
When he’s in the stall, it’s like his secret lair
He does some really really bad things in there
So bad, the dog was sedated
What can I say? He’s constipated

[bridge]
The way we lo-o-ove, is so unique
And what he do-(cough)-oes, is just for me
And screw them if they judge us, ‘cause they don’t see
But baby hurry up, I have to pee

[pre-chorus]
And I said it’s quite the endeavor, feels like I’m in here forever
Stars in my vision as I clench my teeth together
I want you forever, we’ll asphyxiate together
Ours is much better than just whips and chains and leather

[chorus 4]
Must be outta my head, must be outta my mind
But I really love that man of mine
He’s so sweet, since we were first dating
The way that he smells is intoxicating
When he’s in the stall, it’s like his secret lair
He does some really really bad things in there
So bad, the birds all migrated
What can I say? (Jeez, baby) He’s constipated

credits

from The Anarchist's Jokebook, released March 1, 2019
Lyrics, vocals: Devo Spice
Music: Bonecage and Devo Spice
Vocals: Devo Spice and Blythe Renay

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Devo Spice Hardyston, New Jersey

Devo Spice is a nerdcore and comedy rapper from New Jersey who has been called "the red-headed stepson of Weird Al Yankovic and Eminem." His demented brand of hip hop made him one of the most popular artists on the nationally syndicated Dr. Demento Show. In 2011 Devo Spice released the album "Gnome Sane?" and it went to number #28 on the Hip Hop charts on iTunes. ... more

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